1. At what age do you wish to marry?
I figure by the time I’m about 67 years old some couple will ask me to marry them…
2. If the end was near and you had the chance, what would you say to your beloved?
Last one there is a rotten egg…
3. If sex is a game … would you be good at it?
You mean its not? Damn..and I’ve been playing by all these rules….
4. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
I think peeing off the the Empire State Building would be good for a laugh.
5. If you could have 1 dream come true, what would it be?
The one involving licorice whips, strawberry jello and an electrolux vacuum.
6. Do you believe you can survive without money?
As long as nothing cost anything, sure…be a breeze
7. What are you most afraid to lose?
My marbles << — can’t improve on that one…
8. If you won $1 million, what would you do?
Wait…I thought money didn’t exist anymore…make up your mind will you?
9. If someone broke your hand, what would you do?
Have a deep philosophical discussion with the person who broke my hand concerning the ontological forces at play, predicating the need to to abuse my digits and the need to express such hostility within the confines of metaphysical oneness. Then I’d hit him in the head with a two by four.
10. List 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
She’s erudite, animated, terpsichorean.
11. How would you feel if your parents stopped giving you cash to spend?
Sorry. I’m not answering any questions obviously intended for parasitic protozoa (i.e. teenagers)
12. Describe your fantasized-life.
Imagine if Zen and The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance had been written by Bob Guccione. That should just about cover it.
13. What is your ambition?
There’s no need to get nasty about this now is there?
14. What is the one thing that would make you think someone is bad?
I always check for green moldy patches. Sometimes smell alone works.
15. What are the most important things in your life?
Music, friends, family, pizza.
16. Are you a shopaholic or not?
No, I stopped drinking shops a long time ago.
17. If you had the chance, which part of your character would you like to change?
The space just below my knee labeled Scooby-Doo. Always hated Scooby-Doo.
18. Do you believe in yourself?
Given the existential vicissitudes of time, space and vanilla yogurt, I think the premiere thinker of our age, and my personal icon, Daffy Duck, said it best: I’m not crazy. I just don’t give a darn.
19. Honestly, do you think life is fair?
Can be. Can also be partly cloudy and downright stormy.
20. Are you an optimist or pessimist?
I’m a chiropodist.