This has been hanging out in my Draft box for some time…stolen from the seriously AWOL JillieBean…my mind has turned to swiss and I just can’t come up with anything else at the moment.
Layer One: On the Outside
Name: cooper, coop, hey you….
Current Location: orbiting the non-planet Pluto
Eye Color: bloodshot
Hair Color: only my hairdresser knows for sure
Righty or Lefty: omni-dextrous
Zodiac Sign: Gorgo, The Cheese Monster…
Layer Two: Just Below the Surface
Your Weakness: I have this unbridled obsession for rattlesnake milk on the rocks
Your Goal: I gave them up.
Your Fears: Watercress, green asphalt, Dick Cheney
Layer Three: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Your thoughts first waking up: Let’s just say they’d make Catherine The Great blush..
Your bedtime: When Mickey’s little hand is on 11, and his big hand is up his butt
Your most missed memory: If I miss a memory, doesn’t that mean I don’t remember it..and if I don’t remember it, how can I miss it? STOP PLAYING WITH MY MIND!!!!!
Layer Four: Your Pick
Pepsi or Coke: Vanilla Coke
McDonald’s or Burger King: Wendy’s
Single or Group dates: As Woody Allen said, sex between two people is beautiful. Between 5 it’s fantastic..
Adidas or Nike: New Balance…the only ones that will fit!
Lipton Tea or Nestea: Arizona
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla SOFT in a strawberry sundae
Cappuccino or Coffee: neither..never touch the stuff
Layer Five: Do You?
Smoke: must be a fire
Have a crush: not since I got my head out of that vice
Think you’ve been in love: where I least expected it
Want to get married: too late
Believe in yourself: not usually
Think you’re a health freak: oh…right….yeah
Layer Six: In the Past Month
Gone to the mall: no
Eaten Sushi: no
Gone skating: no
Dyed your hair: no – nice life, huh?
Layer Seven: Have You Ever?
Played a stripping game: sure but the mirror always wins…bastard
Gotten beaten up: yep.
Changed who you were to fit in: tried to…it never works.
Layer Eight: Getting Old
Age you’re hoping to be married: 352.68
Plastic Surgery or Wrap: wrap…sun dried tomato with chicken salad lettuce tomato roasted peppers
Buried or Cremated: Buried then cremated…gets cold down there..will need the heat to stay warm
Layer Nine: Perfect Mate
Best Eye Color: burgundy
Best Hair Color: mauve
Short or Long Hair: long……long long long long long……did I say long? I meant long…
Layer Ten: What were you doing…
1 HOUR AGO: deveining lobsters
1 WEEK AGO: going for a spin in the laundromat dryers
1 MONTH AGO: waxing the cat
1 YEAR AGO:. working on the second draft of the book and NOT WORKING!!! WOO HOO!!!!
Layer Eleven: Finish the Sentence
I LOVE: A slice of strawberry tart without so much rat in it
I HATE: Any sentence containing the word NOTLOB.
I HIDE: The corpses
I MISS: Being happy
I NEED: well we’re certainly not going to go into that here….