Let’s walk in the footsteps of one Mark Twain, who said…”
“When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.”
1. When I’m 60 I hope to know more about Christina Hendricks and less about Cotard’s Syndrome.
2. At my 60th birthday party, I can only invite 3 people. They are….Bill Hicks, George Carlin, Kathy Griffin – it’ll be fun if nothing else…
3. “To me old age is always fifteen years older than I am” said Bernard Baruch.
What do you consider old age? The Renaissance.
4. Tom Stoppard was overheard saying, “Age is a high price to pay for maturity.”
What does “maturity” mean to you at any age? The ability to appreciate, without judgement or criticism, the spectacle of Dick Cheney, Keith Olberdork, Bill O’Reilly, Rush Limbaugh, Nancy Pelosi and Dan Quayle wrapped solely in bacon while running down Broadway pursued by a pack of wolves that have been starved for 5 days.
5. Joan Rivers said “Looking fifty is great… if you’re sixty.”
Do you worry about age lines and wrinkles? No. They provide great storage opportunities.
How do you plan to preserve your wonderful selves? Joint compound and an 8 inch putty knife.
6. Comment on this quote by Euripides
“If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.” What mistakes???
7. Pablo Picasso said, “One starts to get young at the age of sixty and then it’s too late.”
What do you do now to stay young and enjoy your life? Every night I pee on the neighbor’s rose bushes and I call my boss a “doody-head”.