One of the recent freshly pressed blogs (wordpress people know what I mean…you blogspot folks will have to catch up) featured the 20 most re-watchable films of all time. The author and I would not co-exist amicably. So, rather than get into a pissing contest on the same subject I am going to give it a twist and list the…
20 Films I’ve Walked Out On or Should Have Walked Out On and Wouldn’t Miss If All Copies Disappeared From The Planet.
OK, the title is a bit wordy.
1. UHF – Weird Al’s foray into films. Thoroughly unfunny and infantile.
2. Young Einstein – a really bad PBS kid’s special…at least that’s what it felt like.
3. Warning Sign – trapped biohazard mutants. Andromeda Strain did it better. Much better.
4. Papillon – I know. Dustin Hoffman, Steve McQueen. Escape adventure. Needlessly bloody and overdrawn. No thanx.
5. Ishtar – Again Dustin Hoffman this time with Warren Beatty. excruciatingly bad and pointless.
6. The Jazz Singer (Neil Diamond Remake) – That Neil Daimond…what an actor. Not.
7. Howard the Duck – Don’t know what George Lucas was thinking. Or for that matter Tim Robbins. Or anyone else…
8. Xanadu – Disco roller skating does not a good film make.
9. Mark of The Devil – Gore before gore was fashionable. Great for human torture freaks.
10. Christmas With The Kranks – the best example of a bad Grisham book translated into a bad movie.
11. The Sound of Music – tedious bilge that’s impossible to endure
11. Pirates of the Carribean IV: On Stranger Tides – zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
13. RV – not even a passable TV movie. The only good thing for Robin Williams is that RV makes Popeye look good.
14. Blind Date – Bruce Willis, Kim Basinger, Blake Edwards – mix and pour down garbage disposal.
15. Norbit – Murphy ego run rampant.
16. Funny Farm – Chevy Chase at his sucktastic worst. Except the snack food commercials. And his talk show. And Fletch 2. And…
17. Mannequin – yeah. this is believable.
18. All Pink Panther movies made after 1975 – I think there are about a dozen of them. Sellers or Martin…just bad.
19. Avatar – being impressed with the effects wears off after five minutes. the rest is way too long. and the team with the most guns wins. blah.
20. Superman IV: Quest For Peace – looked like all the outtakes from superman 1 thru 3 pasted (badly) together. total crap.