qm – 99

Welcome to The Queen’s Meme #99

7 Royal Questions on Tuesday

Today her highness  thought she’d give us 99 questions to answer in honor of the 99th meme. Just kidding! Instead, she gave us 7 questions that just seem like 99.

Surprisingly, it’s called The 99 Meme
1. Let’s take that famously irritating song, Ninety-Nine Bottles of Beer on The Wall. Tell me….What would you substitute for those bottles of beer? Your song would be “Ninety-nine ______ of ______ on the Wall.” Fill in the blanks.
“quarts” “Phlegm”. That should stop the singing in quick order…

2. Let’s go to the 99 cents store. What do you think should be made available for 99 cents at the 99 cents store?
six pack of coke, six pack of sam adams octoberfest, meredith salenger

3. The great world of Wikipedia tells me that scientists claim 99% of all documented species are extinct. Which remaining species in the 1% category would you really like to see extinct.
television news and talk show hosts
And which species in the 99% category would you like to bring back?
The denizens of the Castle Anthrax. ‘Round my place every Saturday…

4. Why is merchandise always priced as 1.99 or 20.99 or 50,287.99? Do they think we’re stupid?
No. They forgot to put zeros in the last two digits of the pricing gun (showing my age here) and 99 looks better than 11.

5. If you live to be 99 years old, what would you like your life to be like in that last decade?
quiet

6. Tumblr has a new blog called “We Are The 99%” brought to you by “the people who occupy Wall Street.” Everyday people are writing notes on paper about their experiences and living conditions right now. Can you identify with the 99% on this page?
don’t get me started

7. I think armpits should get more respect than this. According to the advice of medical personnel: If your child’s temperature is more than 100.4 degrees Fahrenheit measured rectally, or more than 100 degrees Fahrenheit measured in the mouth, or more than 99 degrees Fahrenheit measured in the armpit (for 4-5 minutes), he or she has fever. Why do you think armpits are so slow to register heat?
After absorbing thousands of pounds of anit-bo juice, you’d be slow to register as well. One other thought, when they did this test did the subjects remove the slices of baloney from under their arms? (I really don’t know where that came from…..and it frightens me)

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6 Comments

Filed under humor, meme

6 responses to “qm – 99

  1. from quarts of plegm to baloney in the armpits. well, my appetite is piqued. lunch anyone???

    and just to up the ante… i was pretty sure baloney was harvested from the underarms of some guy so obese he had to hire a nurse to come lift his skin folds to wash only every other week. the baloney was a by-product they decided they could make a buck off of. so your last answer makes perfect sense.

    and saturdays only? live a little!

  2. Rip Ragged

    1. Thimbles, snot
    2. Five dollar bills
    3. “Color” commentators (particularly those associated with professional football)
    4. Habit, undiluted by original thought
    5. Populated with 60-something sympathetic widows.
    6. I can only say I hope more and more democrats start to campaign to the “99%.” The more democrats who openly celebrate Occupy Wall Street, the more sane people will vote Liberarian/Tea Party in 2012.
    7. Hair

  3. 4. The worst has to be gasoline at something.9 cents a gallon.
    7. I just hope they used different thermometers for each part of that experiment…

    Bill

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